Everything That Goes Through My Head on a First Date

Getting Ready for a First Date.

What am I going to wear?

What kind of make-up is appropriate?

Does my outfit match where we’re going/what we’re doing?

What if they don’t like X that I’m wearing?

Fuck it. I don’t care if they don’t like something. This is me (sings the Greatest Showman song in head).

Shall I wear a bright lipstick?

Heeled boots or normal boots?

Followed by; how tall are they?

My hair won’t do as it’s told. I’m not going.

They probably won’t even notice so that’s a stupid reason not too.

If they do, that’s pretty impressive.

Jewellery or no.

Oh god, I need to leave.

Fashionably late it is.

On the way

Did I put perfume on?

Maybe too much?

I think I’m going to be late, best speed up.

Actually, no. Don’t want to be flustered.

I don’t actually like my outfit, I should have worn X.

Again; fuck it. This is me.

Oh, I’m early.

I’ll look busy on my phone. Act casj.

Wait, maybe they’ve seen me and legged it.

Or I looked uninterested and boring because I was on my phone.

Hmm maybe they’ve bailed.

Oh, wait no, that’s them. Panic over.

During a date.

Remember friends’ advice; be nice.

Do I actually come across as cold as I think and joke about?

I think I’m talking too much.

What kind of drink is acceptable?

Remember to ask questions.

And ask them good questions, not boring ones.

I wonder if they like me?

I’m talking way too much about X.

Oh god, I think I’m just being annoying.

Ooh, going to a different bar/pub/somewhere… they must actually be interested then.

If I go to the toilet will they still be there when I come back?

Screw it, I really need to pee.

I’m actually getting hungry.

Ok don’t order anything messy or embarrassing to eat.

Do I have anything in my teeth?

Just one more drink, I don’t want to be drunk and say/do something stupid.

Saying goodbye.

Shall I walk with them to X?

Or are they dropping me off/walking home.

I’ll just make small talk.

Oh no, maybe they just want to leave and get out.

Awkwardly walk with them, not knowing what to do.

Ok, time to say bye.

Do I hug them? Will they go in for a kiss?

A quick kiss and a goodbye with a ‘see you soon hopefully.’

I think that went well for a first date.

Or maybe it was a Chandler Bing “This was great, we should do it again sometime!” bye?

Freak out even more.